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Being there for someone is an art, not a science. There’s no formula or instruction manual because every situation is different.

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Be There Basics will help you learn how to recognize when someone might be struggling with their mental health and gives you 5 Golden Rules to help you support and be there for them.
 

Recognizing warning signs

We all experience less than optimal mental health now and then; whether that’s because of fear, sadness, stress, confusion, grief, or some other kind of mental distress.

What’s important is to recognize when the mental distress you or someone around you is experiencing becomes a mental health problem.

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Someone may be struggling with their mental health if you notice a change in their thoughts, feelings and behaviours that is:

Intense 
(stronger and more persistent than usual ups and downs)
Long-lasting
(usually two weeks or more)
Negatively affecting 
their daily routine, relationships or responsibilities
View examples

Just Be There

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No matter what someone’s going through, being there for them is an art, not a science.
 
There’s no formula to make everything better. But that’s not your job. You don’t have to craft the perfect conversation, you don’t have to have it all figured out.  You don’t have to fix things, you just have to Be There.

Maddi & Rachel

Learning to Be There

 Maddi & Rachel
Learning to Be There | Maddi & Rachel
"Everybody struggles, whether it's with mental illness or just a bad day at work or school. Everybody will have a day where they need some support." Maddi and Rachel met in training to become peer facilitators of a mental health support group. As their friendship grew, they were able to apply what they were learning by being there for one another. One day Rachel noticed Maddi wasn't as outgoing as usual so she checked in with her, listened and offered some encouragement. Maddi appreciated Rachel’s approach explaining, "Your expertise is just in walking with them and listening to them and being there with them when they need some extra support."

The Golden Rules

If you’re concerned someone’s mental distress is more than the regular ups and downs of life, use Be There’s Golden Rules to check in with them and talk about what’s going on.

The Golden Rules can’t tell you exactly what to do to support someone because every person and situation is different. Instead, the Golden Rules are a guide to understanding how to be there in whatever circumstances you find yourself.

Questions from the community

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Say What You See

In an emergency:

This is not a site for personal disclosure of mental health distress, suicidal thoughts or behaviours. If you are in crisis, please call a helpline, 9-1-1 or emergency services or go to your nearest emergency department for assistance.

If someone’s thoughts or behaviours threaten the safety of themselves or others, then this is what’s called a mental health crisis. Call a helpline, 9-1-1 or emergency services. If someone has recently hurt themselves, but is no longer in danger, follow Be There’s Golden Rules and connect them to resources in their area.

Being there for someone experiencing a mental health crisis is different than supporting someone through less severe mental health distress, but the same Golden Rules apply. Learn how the Golden Rules apply and how to Be There in a Crisis.

Be There